Thank you SO MUCH for this post. God, how I needed to read this comforting balm and wisdom from both you and your great grandmother. I will also say, I wish I had learned professors like YOU as I progressed through my undergrad education. My gift is that I can now learn from you with every post you share. Many blessings to you and yours 🙏💕
And, Dr. Glaude, you might give a thought, although you might not care to, to the influence you and other spokespeople for nonwhite American points of view have upon us, guilty and hateful as we've so often been, white folk. Too many of us are lost in disbelief at how awful we can be, will and how swiftly 'the devil' moves once 'he's' in power. We don't know how to live with this evil in 3-D, especially when it includes we ourselves in the bullseye.
I frequently wonder how it is that people of color and other oppressed groups have not slaughtered us in our beds. That they have not is most likely in part because of wise women like your MyMy, who understand the corrosive effects of fighting evil with evil. So you, she, and others know some things we don't. Is there some place, some way to convey your survival, revival and transcending strategies for us, that we might at last realize our kinship and join with you to rid ourselves of this cancer now called Trumpism, but which has gone by many names in the time since 1619?
Hi Leigh, what an interesting comment. I hope you don't mind me chiming in. People of color and other oppressed groups don't slaughter people in their sleep because like most people -- we are good. Mostly. Most people are good and decent human beings. Even, dare I say it, White folk. I do NOT speak for Eddie or Black folk in general, but make no mistake, I am angry. I am chilled to the bone in pain over how ugly folk can be and continue to be. I am frigid to my White friends when they begin to speak of politics or anything really nowadays, and I take good care to breathe deeply and softly as to not spew something that will hurt or enflame the issue more. We don't slaughter people in their sleep - or scream or yell or fight - because our goal is not to win, our goal is to live. In Peace. In Joy. In Love. That is who we are. And in case White folk have forgotten, that is who you are too. The other thing I would say, please take this from my heart that is full and only trying to be kind and helpful... you need not associate yourself with badness. If you are not "those White folk" then don't claim it. Instead, use your influence, your power, your beautifulness -- all that you know to be true about "all of us" is that "...we are more alike, my friends, than we are unalike." - the great Maya Angelou said that. Use all your talents, all your gifts to make right with the world. Behave as IF and show others how it's done. Do not relent. Do not give up. We need you. We need each other. Your Whiteness is not a flaw -- we actually don't blame you all. We see the forest for the trees. Don't claim guilt. Do not claim that you are or were one of the hateful... Your Whiteness can be part of the solution. The truth is, it kinda has to be. Just the other day, someone mentioned that you "should use your powers for good." Acknowledge the power you have, be strong in your conviction and shine through it anyways... I don't know how we'll get through Trump, but I do know, it will be together.
Hopefully, Carmen, you will forgive any typos, spellos, or other errata in my reply. Because I am tearing up as I type. For whatever reason, divine providence perhaps, I have from earliest memory felt sincere kinship with others around me. Until the age of six I don't think I recognized 'color' as a thing. And this is just illustrative of native innocence and not a claim of anything special, but my first 'boyfriend' was a black kid from my class, whose name was Billy, a good 1950's name, to date myself. We used to play marbles after school. One day, after Billy let me claim his beautiful amber 'shooter' I think it was me, but it might have been him who kissed me, in that smacky innocent way kids will kiss, all affection and in no way lustful or demanding. Unfortunately for both of us an older kid, maybe 12 or 13, came upon us at that exact instant and grabbed me, yelling 'What are you doing kissing that nigger?' I still remember, and that was 71 years ago, my shock and sense of 'what?' because that was the first time I ever heard that word and had no idea why it was necessary. I mean, for me, Billy was just Billy, my friend, and I really liked him. Just that. I think in some ways that has informed my life, and I've been pushing back ever since. Who the hell knows why. My ancestors include enslavers, as well as working class French Canadians who emigrated to the US where they were also exploited, although not as heinously. My dad was a GI Bill Harvard grad and the CEO of a company in early Silicon Valley. He sent me to my room without supper when I called him out for making racist remarks. (He was from Arkansas, so...) I only wish I knew how I could be a more effective representative of what I know to be true--that our differences are not those of 'race' or country of origin, but of perspective. Do we have open hearts and generosity of spirit, or don't we? I wish you well, and will continue to wish you well until my last breath. And I am grateful, so grateful, for that. Thanks for your response.
With as much kindness as I can muster, please know you’re already doing it. Sharing your heart, your experience, your thoughts… I have a “brother from another mother” – I actually have a few. My mom died when I was little, I’ve never known who my father is and to make a long story short, I grew up on the streets - poor. If it wasn’t for my 7th grade teacher – Ms. McIntyre (who I’m still in touch with today), if it wasn’t for the Martins, the Walls, the Donnelly’s… I can go on and on, I would not be here today. All of these people were/are good people. I graduated from high school…worked real hard and found my way at a job in the financial district in Boston. I met all these “Yuppies” – and now, I’m dating myself (Ha!) and because of them, I got the shot to go to College. I graduated from UVM.
All these people – all of them – do you know what they have in common? Yes, good people. But also, White. All of them. Please know that is not to say that there were not a lot of POC in the story of my life, they also were good and brilliant folk who I am proud to represent in everything that I do, but my point is, together, we are incredible! Together, we can change a child’s life from a possible disaster, to one that is successful.
My “brother from another mother” Alden is someone who struggles with using his power to influence other White folk. We’ve talked about it. But the truth is, we all have our own style. We all need to do the best we can. And yes, I have screamed at Alden to do more – and he hears me and he tries, but I also understand, he can only do what he is capable of doing. That is what we all need to do. Do I think right now we need to push ourselves a little further? Absolutely! Get out of our comfort zones and do MORE – our democracy is at stake! But also, be kind to yourself Leigh.
It seems to me, you have been in the struggle for a while. And maybe NOW is your time to shine? Or maybe you’ve been shining all along? Either way, know that the pain you felt when you heard your friend called the N word – is what he felt times 10. I know you know that. Being called the N-word is...well how my book starts out. I was just a child the first time I was called it. And not understanding the hate-the vitriol – is so confusing along with it being piercingly painful… but the fact that it pierced you too is why I know, I have faith, we’re gonna be okay.
I’m going to “lightly” yell at you the same way I love on Alden: Talk to your friends, stay engaged, don’t tolerate racism EVER, call it all out, stick up for people, cry with those of us who can barely handle it any more – and yes, use your power as a White woman whenever possible to keep people on point. That is all you need to do. And, I think you’re already doing it...
I know it’s hard to keep our chin up, and stay in the fight - Trust me, I know! But, when you need a break, take one. We got’chyu. But then, come back – and fight. This Trump thing is for REAL REAL. All hands on deck. Period. And whether you like it or not, you are White and you do have power! So, own it, use it and let’s change the world for the better!
There really is no other choice, friend. Stay beautiful. And don’t be so hard on yourself. And I hate to end this being so cliche, but it must be said: "Not everything that is faced can be changed, but nothing can be changed until it is faced." - James Baldwin 🤗
This piece is at once unsettling and strangely calming. It brought me to the edge of my own ugliness- anger, rage, despair, even. Then grandma’s wisdom snatched me back and grounded me something bigger—love. Thank you for sharing Baldwin and grandma with us.
Thank you Eddie! I have been grappling with this type of thing for weeks. Thoughts that show up that are simply not me; not my soul speaking in reaction to all that we are experiencing right now. Thank you for the reminder that love is where the focus needs to be. I will remind myself as often as necessary. Much love for who you are and your wonderful words.
Hello! This is real life and things sometimes happen that don’t fit in how we think the story should go, but let’s take a deep breath and keep moving on!
there is always danger with passion...the more passionate the topic the deeper the involvemnent.,the more you can lose yourself in it, i have myself fallen in rage tweeting,with a wine glass in hand, trying to make people see what is bad or what directions should be taken?..i think what annoys me most about america , is the closing down of argument, its a topic that really annoys me when the political left is dismissed and/or the israelis are pardoned and given a pass.
Because the spirit in me, see's the injustice...i think like many englishmen, we always favour the small guy , the minnow or the giantkiller[particuarly in football, check out crystal palace vs man city-cough, i digress]perhaps check out the bamber bridge incident below] but yes , i think anger and diffusion of tension can be aired or reduced with discussion or argument...but in some things[particularly in america]you are not allowed to talk about them..and so the anger,.resentment and passion builds...and building such things, does build resentment, with bad results if left unreleased.
[bamber bridge was a incident in england during worldwar2 where the black american servicemen were allowed into the englishtown and into the pubs,some white american MP's didnt like the conduct and tried to remove the black american servicemen ,to which the locals objected, which erupted in a small conflict where the black servicement and locals fought back against the american army as they bought in reinforcements:-
"He who fights with monsters might take care lest he thereby become a monster. And if you gaze for long into an abyss, the abyss gazes also into you." - Nietzsche
provide a warning that untapped passions, or release of that anger , can make the good side, as destructive as the bad....its kinda a example here of israel...a ideal that was a good idea for a homeland for a oppressed people, they had a bad start by unhousing people and moving them..but rather than address that....they defended their actions..and ever so slowly the cancer of doing small bad things has grown, to now where they only see answers in military force or explusion or death..with a population accepting of it...[sighs] all of humankind is capable of such acts, and all should beware of the sliding slope..but that is why we have law to make things work,to provide that balance...but when law falls....all bets of restraint come off humans..and destruction is sure to fall, and spread like a cancer to all :(
Thank you SO MUCH for this post. God, how I needed to read this comforting balm and wisdom from both you and your great grandmother. I will also say, I wish I had learned professors like YOU as I progressed through my undergrad education. My gift is that I can now learn from you with every post you share. Many blessings to you and yours 🙏💕
And, Dr. Glaude, you might give a thought, although you might not care to, to the influence you and other spokespeople for nonwhite American points of view have upon us, guilty and hateful as we've so often been, white folk. Too many of us are lost in disbelief at how awful we can be, will and how swiftly 'the devil' moves once 'he's' in power. We don't know how to live with this evil in 3-D, especially when it includes we ourselves in the bullseye.
I frequently wonder how it is that people of color and other oppressed groups have not slaughtered us in our beds. That they have not is most likely in part because of wise women like your MyMy, who understand the corrosive effects of fighting evil with evil. So you, she, and others know some things we don't. Is there some place, some way to convey your survival, revival and transcending strategies for us, that we might at last realize our kinship and join with you to rid ourselves of this cancer now called Trumpism, but which has gone by many names in the time since 1619?
Hi Leigh, what an interesting comment. I hope you don't mind me chiming in. People of color and other oppressed groups don't slaughter people in their sleep because like most people -- we are good. Mostly. Most people are good and decent human beings. Even, dare I say it, White folk. I do NOT speak for Eddie or Black folk in general, but make no mistake, I am angry. I am chilled to the bone in pain over how ugly folk can be and continue to be. I am frigid to my White friends when they begin to speak of politics or anything really nowadays, and I take good care to breathe deeply and softly as to not spew something that will hurt or enflame the issue more. We don't slaughter people in their sleep - or scream or yell or fight - because our goal is not to win, our goal is to live. In Peace. In Joy. In Love. That is who we are. And in case White folk have forgotten, that is who you are too. The other thing I would say, please take this from my heart that is full and only trying to be kind and helpful... you need not associate yourself with badness. If you are not "those White folk" then don't claim it. Instead, use your influence, your power, your beautifulness -- all that you know to be true about "all of us" is that "...we are more alike, my friends, than we are unalike." - the great Maya Angelou said that. Use all your talents, all your gifts to make right with the world. Behave as IF and show others how it's done. Do not relent. Do not give up. We need you. We need each other. Your Whiteness is not a flaw -- we actually don't blame you all. We see the forest for the trees. Don't claim guilt. Do not claim that you are or were one of the hateful... Your Whiteness can be part of the solution. The truth is, it kinda has to be. Just the other day, someone mentioned that you "should use your powers for good." Acknowledge the power you have, be strong in your conviction and shine through it anyways... I don't know how we'll get through Trump, but I do know, it will be together.
Hopefully, Carmen, you will forgive any typos, spellos, or other errata in my reply. Because I am tearing up as I type. For whatever reason, divine providence perhaps, I have from earliest memory felt sincere kinship with others around me. Until the age of six I don't think I recognized 'color' as a thing. And this is just illustrative of native innocence and not a claim of anything special, but my first 'boyfriend' was a black kid from my class, whose name was Billy, a good 1950's name, to date myself. We used to play marbles after school. One day, after Billy let me claim his beautiful amber 'shooter' I think it was me, but it might have been him who kissed me, in that smacky innocent way kids will kiss, all affection and in no way lustful or demanding. Unfortunately for both of us an older kid, maybe 12 or 13, came upon us at that exact instant and grabbed me, yelling 'What are you doing kissing that nigger?' I still remember, and that was 71 years ago, my shock and sense of 'what?' because that was the first time I ever heard that word and had no idea why it was necessary. I mean, for me, Billy was just Billy, my friend, and I really liked him. Just that. I think in some ways that has informed my life, and I've been pushing back ever since. Who the hell knows why. My ancestors include enslavers, as well as working class French Canadians who emigrated to the US where they were also exploited, although not as heinously. My dad was a GI Bill Harvard grad and the CEO of a company in early Silicon Valley. He sent me to my room without supper when I called him out for making racist remarks. (He was from Arkansas, so...) I only wish I knew how I could be a more effective representative of what I know to be true--that our differences are not those of 'race' or country of origin, but of perspective. Do we have open hearts and generosity of spirit, or don't we? I wish you well, and will continue to wish you well until my last breath. And I am grateful, so grateful, for that. Thanks for your response.
With as much kindness as I can muster, please know you’re already doing it. Sharing your heart, your experience, your thoughts… I have a “brother from another mother” – I actually have a few. My mom died when I was little, I’ve never known who my father is and to make a long story short, I grew up on the streets - poor. If it wasn’t for my 7th grade teacher – Ms. McIntyre (who I’m still in touch with today), if it wasn’t for the Martins, the Walls, the Donnelly’s… I can go on and on, I would not be here today. All of these people were/are good people. I graduated from high school…worked real hard and found my way at a job in the financial district in Boston. I met all these “Yuppies” – and now, I’m dating myself (Ha!) and because of them, I got the shot to go to College. I graduated from UVM.
All these people – all of them – do you know what they have in common? Yes, good people. But also, White. All of them. Please know that is not to say that there were not a lot of POC in the story of my life, they also were good and brilliant folk who I am proud to represent in everything that I do, but my point is, together, we are incredible! Together, we can change a child’s life from a possible disaster, to one that is successful.
My “brother from another mother” Alden is someone who struggles with using his power to influence other White folk. We’ve talked about it. But the truth is, we all have our own style. We all need to do the best we can. And yes, I have screamed at Alden to do more – and he hears me and he tries, but I also understand, he can only do what he is capable of doing. That is what we all need to do. Do I think right now we need to push ourselves a little further? Absolutely! Get out of our comfort zones and do MORE – our democracy is at stake! But also, be kind to yourself Leigh.
It seems to me, you have been in the struggle for a while. And maybe NOW is your time to shine? Or maybe you’ve been shining all along? Either way, know that the pain you felt when you heard your friend called the N word – is what he felt times 10. I know you know that. Being called the N-word is...well how my book starts out. I was just a child the first time I was called it. And not understanding the hate-the vitriol – is so confusing along with it being piercingly painful… but the fact that it pierced you too is why I know, I have faith, we’re gonna be okay.
I’m going to “lightly” yell at you the same way I love on Alden: Talk to your friends, stay engaged, don’t tolerate racism EVER, call it all out, stick up for people, cry with those of us who can barely handle it any more – and yes, use your power as a White woman whenever possible to keep people on point. That is all you need to do. And, I think you’re already doing it...
I know it’s hard to keep our chin up, and stay in the fight - Trust me, I know! But, when you need a break, take one. We got’chyu. But then, come back – and fight. This Trump thing is for REAL REAL. All hands on deck. Period. And whether you like it or not, you are White and you do have power! So, own it, use it and let’s change the world for the better!
There really is no other choice, friend. Stay beautiful. And don’t be so hard on yourself. And I hate to end this being so cliche, but it must be said: "Not everything that is faced can be changed, but nothing can be changed until it is faced." - James Baldwin 🤗
Words I needed today. Beautiful reflection.
Thank you for this excellent analysis. We will not allow rage to fester, Hope and courage are contagious. Bless you.
This piece is at once unsettling and strangely calming. It brought me to the edge of my own ugliness- anger, rage, despair, even. Then grandma’s wisdom snatched me back and grounded me something bigger—love. Thank you for sharing Baldwin and grandma with us.
Thank you Professor Glaude. In times like this we need and appreciate your wisdom and calming delivery of the truth.
Grateful for the combined brilliance of Baldwin your Mymy, and you. Appreciate the warning against certainty. 🙏
Thank you Eddie! I have been grappling with this type of thing for weeks. Thoughts that show up that are simply not me; not my soul speaking in reaction to all that we are experiencing right now. Thank you for the reminder that love is where the focus needs to be. I will remind myself as often as necessary. Much love for who you are and your wonderful words.
Dr. Eddie,
Hello! This is real life and things sometimes happen that don’t fit in how we think the story should go, but let’s take a deep breath and keep moving on!
Thank you. Far too much ugliness and divisiveness today. Peace and Love to you. ♥️
Thank you.
Thanks for the reminder. This was so beautifully written! I’m more committed to not letting them steal my joy🙏🏽🥰
I so appreciate your point of view.
there is always danger with passion...the more passionate the topic the deeper the involvemnent.,the more you can lose yourself in it, i have myself fallen in rage tweeting,with a wine glass in hand, trying to make people see what is bad or what directions should be taken?..i think what annoys me most about america , is the closing down of argument, its a topic that really annoys me when the political left is dismissed and/or the israelis are pardoned and given a pass.
Because the spirit in me, see's the injustice...i think like many englishmen, we always favour the small guy , the minnow or the giantkiller[particuarly in football, check out crystal palace vs man city-cough, i digress]perhaps check out the bamber bridge incident below] but yes , i think anger and diffusion of tension can be aired or reduced with discussion or argument...but in some things[particularly in america]you are not allowed to talk about them..and so the anger,.resentment and passion builds...and building such things, does build resentment, with bad results if left unreleased.
[bamber bridge was a incident in england during worldwar2 where the black american servicemen were allowed into the englishtown and into the pubs,some white american MP's didnt like the conduct and tried to remove the black american servicemen ,to which the locals objected, which erupted in a small conflict where the black servicement and locals fought back against the american army as they bought in reinforcements:-
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Battle_of_Bamber_Bridge
https://www.bracknellnews.co.uk/news/national/23611702.uk-village-marks-80th-anniversary-fight-us-army-racism-war/
https://theconversation.com/black-troops-were-welcome-in-britain-but-jim-crow-wasnt-the-race-riot-of-one-night-in-june-1943-98120#:~:text=He%20was%20told%20that%20they,June%2024%2D25%2C%201943. ]
As ever the words of :-
"He who fights with monsters might take care lest he thereby become a monster. And if you gaze for long into an abyss, the abyss gazes also into you." - Nietzsche
provide a warning that untapped passions, or release of that anger , can make the good side, as destructive as the bad....its kinda a example here of israel...a ideal that was a good idea for a homeland for a oppressed people, they had a bad start by unhousing people and moving them..but rather than address that....they defended their actions..and ever so slowly the cancer of doing small bad things has grown, to now where they only see answers in military force or explusion or death..with a population accepting of it...[sighs] all of humankind is capable of such acts, and all should beware of the sliding slope..but that is why we have law to make things work,to provide that balance...but when law falls....all bets of restraint come off humans..and destruction is sure to fall, and spread like a cancer to all :(
Thank you!
Makes perfect sense the entire administration.